Today's Message Index:
----------------------
1. 12:25 PM - my retirement (Dan Farmer)
2. 12:45 PM - Re: my retirement (Barry Collman)
3. 01:02 PM - Re: my retirement (john@vormbaum.com)
Message 1
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Yesterday was two months since I last flew a B777 and I was at my local Wal
-Mart buying a large bag of Purina Dog
Chow for my loyal pet, Sheriff the Wonder Dog, and was in the checkout li
ne
when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog?
What did she think I had, an
elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told
her
that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the-Purina Diet again.
I
added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last
time,
but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward w
ith
tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her
that
it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way it works is to load yo
ur
pants pockets full with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every ti
me
you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and
I was
going to try it again.
-
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now
enthralled with my story)
Horrified, she ask if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the curb to sniff an Irish
Setters-ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard. Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch
what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think
of
crazy things to say.
N500DF
=0A=0A=0A
Message 2
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| Subject: | Re: my retirement |
Hi Dan,
Really funny - thanks so much.
Here's wishing you a Happy & Peaceful 2009.
Very Best Regards,
Barry
----- Original Message -----
From: Dan Farmer
To: commander-list-digest@matronics.com
Sent: Saturday, December 27, 2008 8:25 PM
Subject: Commander-List: my retirement
Yesterday was two months since I last flew a B777 and I was at
my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for my loyal
pet, Sheriff the Wonder Dog, and was in the checkout line when the woman
behind me asked if I had a dog?
What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and
have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
was starting the Purina Diet again.
I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and
that the way it works is to load your pants pockets full with Purina
nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food
is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it
again.
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was
now enthralled with my story)
Horrified, she ask if I ended up in intensive care because the
dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the curb to sniff an
Irish Setters ass and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he
was laughing so hard. Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time
in the world to think of crazy things to say.
N500DF
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3D
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3D
Message 3
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| Subject: | Re: my retirement |
Dan, good boy! Woof!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
-----Original Message-----
From: "Barry Collman" <barry.collman@air-britain.co.uk>
Subject: Re: Commander-List: my retirement
This is a multi-part message in MIME format.
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